My name is Amara. I grew up with many potential suitors. One thing I never did was rush into courtship with any of them. I took my time to engage in meaningful conversations with each one before determining whether such a relationship could evolve into marriage. Among all these potential suitors, one stood out by ticking more than half of my criteria boxes, albeit with a few question marks. I didn’t want to take chances, so I became more engaged in conversations with him. Over time, it became clear to me that I would have made a significant mistake if I had ignored the other unticked boxes.
How Our Relationship Began
Jackson was a man I encountered at the park while traveling from Owerri to Port Harcourt. He mentioned that he was returning from Port Harcourt, which is how we ended up meeting at the same park. He expressed his admiration for my composure and quiet nature, which initially attracted him to me. We exchanged numbers, and I continued on to my destination while he proceeded to his own.
Our relationship journey
Upon reaching my destination, I received a call from Jackson, as if he had timed my bus perfectly, marking the beginning of our relationship story. He revealed to me that he studied Mechanical Engineering at the Enugu State University of Technology and is originally from there. Born and raised in a family of five—two boys and three girls—he is the youngest child. While his family attends the Anglican Church, he is a member of Winner’s Chapel. Jackson also shared that his family owns a house in the city of Enugu, yet he chose to live independently in a rented one-bedroom apartment, not far from their family home.
recently graduated from Imo State University, where I studied Medical Laboratory Science. I also hail from Imo State. I was preparing to go for NYSC, which initially made me hesitant about his eagerness to advance our relationship. However, he promised that after marriage, I would be able to serve in the same state where he resides.
The qualities I admired in him included his deeply religious nature; he was someone who took church activities seriously, preached about God, and seemed highly disciplined. In fact, the first gift I received from him was a Bible. He was also very caring and disliked sensing that someone was not in the right mood. Financially, he was as generous as his means allowed. Although a graduate, Jackson joined his family business and opened his own interior decoration enterprise, where he excelled remarkably.
Things I later discovered about him that I dislike
I started feeling reluctant about the relationship when he told me that he learnt that people from my state were very disrespectful, that he has zero tolerance for such. Although, he said he didn’t see me as someone who is disrespectful. He affirmed that any day his wife insults his Mom, that it will bring a long lasting issue in their union. He said that he has been rightfully informed that people from my state do not have much respect for elders.
Jackson told me not to disclose to my people that his business is moving well, let them see him as a puppet, his reason being that he learnt that rich people becomes poor after marrying from my state. The most annoying thing that he said to me was that he will take me to his pastor for a special deliverance before our marriage, which I personally believe that it’s an insult to my person because I strongly believe that I didn’t need such deliverance.
After carefully analyzing all that he said, I realized that it might not be a smooth journey after all. Having already breeded a special hatred for people from my state, that’s already a red flag.
How many ended the relationship
I started delaying the whole marriage plan process while also picking my points from our conversations because he doesn’t mind repeating such utterances. I delayed the whole arrangements until my NYSC posting came out and I gladly let him know that I don’t want to get married till I finish my NYSC. This came like a bombshell to him because he said he doesn’t want the year to end without him getting married. Gradually, I avoided his calls until he decided to let me be. Though he later accepted to wait until I finish my NYSC but I made it known to him that I’m not longer interested in the whole arrangement.
I’m sharing this story because I’m pleased that Jackson eventually married someone from his own state, which I believed would be a better choice for him. I met my soulmate two years later, and we are happily married.
Note: “This is for educational purpose and names have been changed for confidentiality.”
